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Showing posts from June, 2006

truth hurts but it heals too

2 nights ago, I asked a very close friend of mine if I am an insistent person. Haha.. without any second thoughts, she said yes. Wow, that drove a long nail right through my heart. If you ask, you'll get the answers. Of course, initially I would think to myself, I do not think I am an insistent person all the time but I only insist when I am sure about certain things close to my heart i.e. when I have been seeking God about it or it is IN my system due to long periods of conditioning e.g. spiritually or just my personal value system. That analysis certainly made me felt better but it also got me reflecting (truth heals). As I thought through, certainty about something for me will activate a wish/desire to see it happen immediately and NOW. If it is God's will, it is NOW. As I look back on buying our first flat, it was the same. When I first view the unit (my current place), I was quite sure that the house was IT. But my then fiance and husband now do not think so and asked me

Marriage is not just a piece of paper/contract/agreement...

Watched a talk show last night on channel U and they were debating whether marriage is a good way of keeping couples together. 2 camps. One obviously believes that marriage is an important institution for the community at large. The other do not think that marriage is THE institution for the community. Those who belonged to this line of opinion felt that marriage is only a paper, a contract and an agreement that does not prove anything. Love between two couples can carry on without this agreement. This mindset stems from the perception that if one gets married, one can get divorce (easily) as well. Therefore, if the agreement can be so easily broken why have it in the first place. The escalating trend of divorce has discriminated the sacred act of marriage. For people who feels that marriage is only a contract, I feel sorry for them. I believe that love for each other finally should bring us to a commitment to want to live lives together and share the good and bad. For better, for wors

God leads us along

I attended a memorial service of Pastor Derek Tan, Former President of TCA, the bible school which I graduated from. It was a night of remembering. The fondest memory I have of him was his sense of humour. Last night, a lecturer of the bible school gave her eulogy, his sense of humour once again surfaced. On his hospital bed, he asked his fellow colleague to bring him some good food. When asked what he would like to eat, he asked for sharks' fins. Food and humour. As I sat where I was listening to the eulogies, I asked myself, what a person be most remembered for? For Pastor Derek Tan, he will always be remembered for his kindness and graciousness, beyond all that he has accomplished, a man like him will always be remembered by how he has treated others. No hint of ranks lurks each time I sit in his room after a semester ends to discuss which courses I should be taking for the next semester. He would talk to me like how would talk to a friend. I will always remember his reassuring

Habakkuk

Yes, I have a new blogskin aka template. Decided to make it brighter :) While travelling to work this morning, this passage came to my mind. Habbakuk 3:17 - 19 Though the fig tree should not blossom And there be no fruit on the vines, Though the yield of the olive should fail And the fields produce no food, Though the flock should be cut off from the fold And there be no cattle in the stalls, Yet I will exult in the Lord, I will rejoice in the God of my salvation. The Lord God is my strength, And He has made my feet like hinds' feet, And makes me walk on my high places. Will I still praise and delight in Him when I do not immediately receive relief from pain? Will I still love Him and cling to Him when I do not immediately receive answers? Will I continue to have faith if what happens around me do not harmonize with what I believe? Will I allow God sovereignty to over-rule? i must.

Retreat: Phrases to remember

Just came back from Batu Pahat for our church retreat 2006. I really enjoyed the pace of the retreat and also took time to get to talk to people I see in church on sundays that I seldom get a chance to talk to. It was also a time for many to share their testimonies and it was a good time listening to most of the people who shared their journeys. I want to thank God for helping me find some answers in this camp. There were also a few things that a few people spoke that had impacted my thoughts. I shall write it here and remember these phrases for a long time and come back to it as and when I need to. I paraphrase: 1. Be like a child - simply trust and believe - don't ask why why why... 2. To win the prize, the heavenward prize, all we need to do is to complete the race 3. Have faith in God, pray and believe in the impossible but LET HIM decide on the timing 4. Understanding the experience is important as well as responding to the experience 5. Power need not only be something outwar

Empower meeeee

Empower Me by Claire Cloninger, David T. Clydesdale Verse 1: Nobody knows how weak I am, better than You; Nobody sees all of my needs, better than You. And nobody has the power to change me, from what I was born to be. Jesus be strong in my weakness, empower me! Chorus: Empower me, like a rushing river flowing to the sea. Lord, send Your Holy Spirit flowing now through me. Till I'm living as Your child, victorious and free, send the power of Your love, empower me. Verse 2: Nobody's eyes see through my soul, better than Yours; Nobody's love can make me whole, no one but Yours. And nobody has the power to lift me, to reach for eternity. Jesus break through all my defenses, empower me. It's interesting how songs have a way with me. The song above was a song I sang several years ago at my graduation from TCA. Tears rolled down my eyes as I was singing this song and the tears kept on rushing down my face, faster than I could wipe them away. I wasn't sure why but I knew

Chance vs Divine

It's my second straight week of leading worship and it's been a while since I had such a routine. Wierd as it may sound, I am leading two hymns again this week. I'm not really a hymns person but it seems that the divine has something else in mind. Last week, I led "On Higher Ground" and "Pass me not" This week, my repertoire of songs include "I don't know about tomorrow" and "It is well with my soul". To be honest, on Monday night, I was trying very hard to shake these two songs out of my mind but it never materialized. Finally I 'gave in' to the divine because obviously, He knows what HE IS DOING. Chance or Divine? I always believed everything happens for a reason and the reason is sometimes only known to the Father. We may not even get to know the reason but obedience does not require us to know/understand everything. Some people believe in chance. Leaving our life to chance seems fatalistic. It does not require our in