You are the Potter, I am the clay

After I became a Christian, I was in an Anglican Church for 10 years of my life. Bi-monthly we will have our holy communion, a act for us to remember the Lord's death as we eat the "bread" and drink the "cup". The Pastor presiding the Holy Communion will read from the book of common prayer and the congregation will respond at some points. I will always remember the "Prayer of Humble Access", a prayer all of us pray before we eat the "bread" and drink from the "cup" It goes like this: "We do not presume to come to this your table merciful Lord, trusting in our own righteousness, but in your manifold and great mercies we are not worthy so much as to gather up the crumbs under your table. But You are the same Lord, whose nature is always to have mercy. Grant us therefore gracious Lord, so to eat the flesh of your dear Son Jesus Christ and to drink his blood, that we may evermore dwell in Him and He in us. Amen" Over the year...

My long day yesterday. 6.30am - 7.00am woke up 7.00am - 7.30am traveled to Sengkang to feed my beloved dog (parents away) 7.30am - 8.15am breakfast 8.45am - GCE in church 10.30am - 11.40am JSS 11.40am - 12.30pm Service 12.30pm - 2.30pm Fellowship, Lunch 2.30pm - 6.15pm AGM 6.15 - 7.50pm Dinner at "Chomp Chomp" By 6.15pm, I was already very exhausted. The dinner managed to perk me up slightly. However, when we got home, I was really praying for a parking lot right below my flat. It is always full because lots are scarce. So I just prayed, with a "if is God willing" sort of faith... one car was ahead of us and he zoom quite quickly ahead. No lots. We drove and lo and behold, i saw the headlights of a Mercedes Benz light up after we passed it. I told Adrian to reverse and indeed the merc was leaving and we got the lot. It sounds trivial but it was one of those lessons that I was learning about "Praying" again. Ask, Seek and Knock. It's not enough to just ...

I am exactly 1 month away from my due date. Ask me, am I excited? I'll probably give you a very melancholic look. Maybe it's because I am seldom excitable. For me, the journey ahead has not yet begun and I face it with a degree of apprehension. Thoughts like, "Will i be a good mother", "Will my daughter turn out well" can sometimes overwhelm me. I have to intentionally l surrender and not be overly anxious. It's a new thing. It's a new challenge. This challenge is something I have never encountered and each step along the way, I'll learn to seek God and his guidance. I can read many books but ultimately it's the wisdom that God gives that will enable me to be a good parent. There are so many people who has experience on parenting yet each experience is unique to the individual. While there's general truth about some experiences, the variable factor is that each child is unique. It's like when some people look at my tummy and overall c...

someone said, we don't really love God until we learn to trust in Him fully, totally and absolutely...

As I was thinking of how to pray for leaders in the church. I was reminded by the Holy Spirit that just because we are serving Him in the church, it doesn't mean we are or can be immune from sin or temptations. Just look at the countless numbers of leaders, preachers, pastors present in history and now, some have fell and were not immortals. This thought came as a reminder to myself to that in every aspects of my life, I need to walk with the Lord, love Him and live for Him. Yesterday's sermon topic in church was on the "Fear of the Lord" and as I read it, it defined for me what "Fear of the Lord is..." Prov 8:13 - it is to hate evil, pride, arrogance, the evil way and the perverted mouth... - As leaders we need to fear God and to walk away from evil. It's not good enough just to know what we must do... I must constantly let God check my heart so that I will not allow pride and arrogance to grow like weeds... it's so easy to be filled with pride and ...